


Bridge over Troubled Water

by Thundersnow (pieprincess_andthe_fallenangel)



Category: DC's Legends of Tomorrow (TV), The Flash (TV 2014)
Genre: Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, Blow Jobs, Canon Compliant, Don’t copy to another site, First time giving a blow job, First time with a man, Humour, Lewis Snart's A+ Parenting, M/M, Past Child Abuse, Porn With Plot, Post Oculus, Post-Crisis On Earth-X Crossover Event (CW DC TV Universe), Post-Episode: s03e22 Infantino Street, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Series Spoilers, Time Travel, actually it's mostly just smut and angst, identity crisis, oh god so much angst, please ask before translating, sex with feelings
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-09-12
Updated: 2019-09-12
Packaged: 2020-11-02 03:30:35
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 8,913
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20607575
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/pieprincess_andthe_fallenangel/pseuds/Thundersnow
Summary: After the Oculus exploded, Len didn’t die. Instead, he got spat out on a random stretch of dirt in the late ’80s. By the time his team showed up only a couple of days had passed for him, but it had been considerably longer for everyone else. Sara and Mick fill him in on what he’s missed over the last couple of years, but some things are easier to learn about than others and an unexpected visit from Barry Allen forces Len to finally face his feelings head-on.





	Bridge over Troubled Water

**Author's Note:**

> I know that the Coldflash Bingo (which was run by [ColdflashWeeks](https://coldflashweeks.tumblr.com/) on Tumblr) has ended now, but I started a bunch of prompts months ago and never finished them because I sort of, kind of, accidentally went on a writing hiatus for six months. But I didn’t want to leave them in my drafts folder, so I decided to finish my bingo card unofficially on my own. This fills the ‘_it’s called a hug_’ prompt :)
> 
> The idea behind this one was pretty simple; I wondered if there could be a reason for Len being not-quite-straight in canon without Mick knowing. It didn’t take me long to find an answer to that question :(  
#LenIsAndAlwaysWillBePansexual #WhetherCanonAcceptsItOrNot
> 
> Honestly, this is so different from anything I’ve written before, so hopefully, you guys like it!

When Len woke up after the explosion, his first thought was that he needed to get a message to his team. Well, actually, no: his first thought had been ‘_how the hell am I alive?_’ followed quickly by ‘_where the hell am I?_’ but it hadn’t taken Len long to get his mind on the right track.

Because as fun as the ’80s had been, Len didn’t quite feel like getting trapped there.

The first thing he tried was the whole _Back to the Future_ letter trick… it didn’t work as planned. The guy at the Post Office gave Len the weirdest look when he’d asked that his letter not be delivered until mid-2016. And either he didn’t care for Len’s instructions and ignored them, or the letter got lost in the system because he’d given a particular date, place, and time in his message and he’d waited for _hours,_ but no one came.

The next plan Len came up with was just to create a little hell. Enough that it would create a few ripples in time for Gideon to pick up on, but not enough that it would change the future. The first thing Len did was rob a bank. He needed the money, okay? Plus, he _had_ just sacrificed himself to save the world, so Len thought he deserved the chance to blow off a little steam.

No one came.

The next day, Len broke into Central City University and stole a few canisters of liquid nitrogen. He used them to rig a few traps outside of the police precinct which would drop hot water into the cannister and cause a few mini-explosions, just loud enough and showy enough to get a bit of attention without harming anyone. Len used the distraction to buy up the cops’ time as he robbed a jewellery store across the other side of town because, hey, who said he wasn’t allowed to have some fun while he waited for his team to show their asses? He allowed himself, dressed in his newly acquired parka, to get caught on the CCTV footage at both the store and the precinct, though he was careful not to leave behind any other evidence. Len was barely 15 at this point in the timeline, and so he wasn’t worried that his picture floating around would do any damage, but any DNA evidence he left behind might just come back to bite his past-self in the ass.

After the heist, he went back to hiding out in the abandoned warehouse where he and Mick used to hang out and get high in back when they were still fresh out of juvie, confident that it would be the first place that Mick would think to check. He hid out there for the entirety of the next day and waited.

Still, no one came.

Len was beginning to get worried by the fifth day. He spent hours coming up with ideas to bring ice or snow into the mix, thinking how much easier the whole thing would be if he had his cold gun with him. Len eventually managed to come up with a system using a high-pressure water pipe, an industrial leaf-blower, and the leftover canisters of liquid nitrogen to keep the equipment cooled. He set it up on top of the town hall roof and switched it on, effectively producing fake snow. It melted pretty quickly, but it was enough to get the attention of the media, considering it was mid-July.

On the seventh day, Len was in the middle of robbing a Radio Shack, planning to make a video of some kind to send to the news station, when they finally showed up. Though things had most certainly changed with the Legends. Ray, Mick, and Sara were the only faces he recognised within his team, but the others seemed to all know him if the surprised and apprehensive looks on their faces were anything to go by.

“About time you guys showed up,” he drawled as he watched everyone lower their weapons.

“How…” Ray was the first of them to speak, though he couldn’t seem to find the words to finish his question.

“Am I still alive?” Len finished for him and then gave a dramatic shrug. “Guess I’m harder to kill then we thought.” No one moved. They just kept staring at him like he’d grown a second head, one which had tried to bite them. “No, it’s okay. Don’t all try to hug me at once,” he drawled.

“If this is some kind of trick, Leonard,” Sara warned. Len didn’t understand what kind of ‘trick’ she thought was happening but looking at her now reminded him of her parting gift. It hadn’t been a particularly fantastic kiss what with all the danger, fear, and adrenaline coursing through the both of them at the time. Still, it _had_ meant something to Len. He’d thought it had meant something to Sara too, though he couldn’t have been sure. He wondered if she regretted it now that she knew he was alive.

“As much as it seems we really need to catch up,” Len drawled. “How about we get out of here first? The cops will be here soon, and I don’t much feel like getting trapped in this time. If I have to see another idiot with a male ponytail in a valour tracksuit or, God forbid, _parachute pants_… I won’t be held accountable for my actions.”

That seemed to break the Legends out of their reverie. They quickly led Len out of the Radio Shack and back to the Waverider. Though with the way they crowed around him, Len felt suspiciously more like a prisoner than he did a friend. Even _Mick_ was keeping one hand on his heat gun as he walked beside Len.

Whatever it was that had got them so on edge, Len was dreading hearing about it.

[] [] []

Leo Snart.

Leo _fucking_ Snart.

Anything else, Len could handle. The little adventure his past-self had been mixed up in which had put his team on edge around him? That was easy to shrug off. Hearing that Sara was off of the market now was a little disappointing, though not as much as he would have thought. Finding out it had been _three and a half years_ since the Oculus blew was more difficult. Learning that Stein had died in his absence was even harder… he had liked that old man.

But hearing that there was another _him_ running around out there. Learning that he’d been replaced, even temporarily as it was, by a lighter, more optimistic, openly gay version of himself was a hard pill to swallow. This man lived in a world occupied by Nazis and came out of it not only as a hero, more of a hero than Len could ever be, but also managed to find a way to be completely open like that?

Len couldn’t understand it.

He’d been staring at Leo’s picture for _hours_ now, reading and rereading everything that Gideon knew about him. Everyone else had gone to bed hours ago, but Len hadn’t been able to sleep with all the information and questions running through his mind. He’d eventually asked Gideon about _Leo,_ and he’d been staring at these holograms ever since.

Len wished it didn’t bother him so much. He wanted to just shrug it off and get a good night’s rest. But it was driving him crazy. Leo lived in a world under Nazi rule, a world where being gay was punishable by death, and yet he was still able to be so open about it when Len… _couldn’t_. Just thinking it to himself, just entertaining the idea of being with another man, made him feel scared and weak. Len kept having to rub his hands on his jeans to dry them, but he couldn’t seem to stop them from sweating. He’d denied this part of himself for so long that he’d almost been able to convince himself that it didn’t exist. But hearing about Leo and his _husband_ was like someone had flipped on a switch at the back of Len’s head and now he couldn’t get his mind on anything _else_.

He was jealous, he realised. Jealous that this other Leonard Snart was so comfortable and confident about his sexuality. He was jealous that this man was happy and in love when Len had never been either. He’d never let himself fall in love. He’d never been able to be so vulnerable with another person before. With women, Len had always found a way to mess it up. And with men… Len had never even let it begin.

Len wished he could blame someone for that, but he was realising now that the only person to blame was himself.

If Leo could be openly gay on Nazi-Earth, then Len could have gotten past his father’s homophobic comments and beatings.

Len’s mind was going around and around in circles and, the more he thought about it, the more he regretted his decisions. But it was too late now, wasn’t it? Who would want to be with a confused man in his 40’s who never had so much as kissed another guy?

Len sighed and closed his eyes, leaning forward against the console and wishing there was some way to go back and redo things. But, hey, he’d tried that before. He’d tried to keep Lewis out of jail, but it hadn’t worked. He might be on a time ship, but he couldn’t just go back and change whatever he wanted. It just didn’t work like that, no matter how much he wished that it did.

It was about then that Len felt it.

There was a shift in the air around him, a slight breeze, a crackle of static.

Barry.

Len knew that the Flash was standing behind him before he even opened his eyes and it didn’t do anything to ease his unsettled nerves. In fact, it only made him feel worse. Here he was, questioning his life choices, and Barry Allen decides to show up. The same Barry Allen that made Len’s knees weak and his heart race. The Barry Allen that teased Len and pushed as good as he got but still somehow had all of that hope and brightness in his eyes. The same Barry who had been the star of several of Len’s very _particular_ dreams.

He was the epitome of everything that Len had been aching over for the past two hours, and it was the worst possible time for him to drop by. But Len wouldn’t let that bother him now. He took a deep breath and stood up straight, glancing at the picture of Leo once more before turning to face the Flash. Len lent back against the console and crossed his arms, dipping his head in way of greeting.

“Surprised to see me?” Len drawled, smirk in place. Barry was gawping at him as though he could barely believe his eyes. The next thing Len knew, he was being pulled into a big bear hug by one Scarlet Speedster. Len was so shocked by it that he froze; he was utterly lost for words as Barry’s arms wrapped around him. He could only blink, opening and closing his mouth like a fish as he tried fruitlessly to come up with some sarcastic remark. But his mind felt like it was rebooting on him.

"Sara left me a message and said you were alive,” Barry said. Idly, Len realised he smelt a little sweet like maybe his shampoo was berry scented. “But I didn't really believe it until I saw you."

"What are you doing?" Len eventually managed to ask, though his voice came out sounding a little softer than he’d intended.

"It's called a hug, Leo," Barry laughed, and Len tensed instantly. _Leo_. God, Len hated that name. So, Barry had met him too then? Len supposed that made sense. He bet the two of them were close, best buddies even. Barry didn't seem to notice Len clench up as he was already pulling away, a smile in his eyes. "You've missed a lot."

"So, I've been told," his voice had that sharp lilt to it again now, but Barry didn’t seem fazed by that.

“Where’ve you been?”

“Around,” Len drawled noncommittally and shrugged dramatically.

“You couldn’t have sent out a message to let us know you were okay?” Barry teased.

“The Oculus only blew a few days ago for me,” he said as a way of explanation. Barry was smiling at him, so wide and happy, and it made Len feel off. He liked it, a little too much actually, but if Barry had genuinely cared about his life then… “You couldn’t have warned me about that when you picked me up for your little ARGUS heist?”

Len felt stupid for not realising it at the time. Barry had picked him up and taken him to 2017, over a year after he had left on the Waverider. Why would Barry have bothered to pick up a past version of Len, risking him learning something he shouldn’t, unless he _had_ no future?

Len _really_ should have put it together sooner. But maybe he just didn’t want to? He’d known that something was off, but he just hadn’t wanted to think too hard on it. He’d been too busy enjoying the moment. Too enthralled in Barry’s presence again… it had been so long since they’d last danced around their game with one another that Len had just got caught up in it. Not to mention the fact that Barry, _the Flash_, was asking for Len’s help with a heist. And it wasn’t just any old job, but potentially the biggest heist that Len had ever pulled. It was… intoxicatingly good.

“I…” Barry’s smile had slipped away. Len felt simultaneously satisfied and horrible about that. Barry took a half a step forward, and another whiff of that sweet shampoo in his hair filled Len’s nose. “I wanted to warn you,” he said. He sounded so _earnest_. “But I couldn’t. I’d already messed with the timeline, and I was paying for my mistakes. I’d tried to save my parents, and I’d instead created a timeline where Cisco’s brother was dead, Caitlin had powers and was losing control, and…” he paused and looked as though he wanted to avert his gaze but couldn’t. “And I created Savitar.” His voice sounded raw.” I couldn’t do that again,” he told Len, his eyes were so big and honest that Len actually thought he might forgive him. “I couldn’t be selfish.”

“Selfish?” Len drawled; he felt a little breathless at the confession. “An odd word to choose, Barry. How would saving little old me work in your own self-interest?”

“I don’t know… maybe I like having you around,” Barry said. There was a twist of a smile playing on his lips which drew Len’s gaze.

Len wondered what it would feel like to kiss him. It was a stupid fantasy, he knew. Barry had Iris. And even if he didn’t, that didn’t mean that he would want _Len_. Enjoying someone’s company didn’t mean you wanted to be with them. There was a significant distinction there that Len needed to make. Still, it was a nice thought… now that he was actually _allowing_ himself to think it.

"Leo-" Barry said softly. That shattered Len’s daydream pretty quickly. He was instantly tense.

"_Don't_ call me that," Len finally snapped, taking a threatening step forward and pointing a finger in Barry's face. _Leo_ was what his father had called him. _Leo_ was a scared boy taking beatings for his mistakes. And now, apparently, _Leo_ was the man who had replaced Leonard while his friends had all thought he was dead.

"I'm... sorry," Barry apologised, though he didn't quite understand why he was saying it. They were standing so close now, as close as they had been that winter night when he’d broken into Joe West’s house to warn Barry about Mardon. Len remembered how Barry had pushed him up against the wall and how it should have pissed him off, but it hadn’t. The memory sent a chill down Len’s spine that wasn’t entirely uncomfortable. "What's wrong?"

"Nothing," Len bit back, because how was he supposed to explain what was going through his head right now? And why should Barry even care?

He tried to barge past the speedster then, making for the exit. He needed some space to breathe in, some air that wasn’t already filled up with the scent of _Barry_. But Barry grabbed his arm and pulled him to a halt. Len glared at Barry's face and then down at the hand tightened around his bicep, the threat clear in his eyes. Barry got the message and let him go, but not before Len noticed the suspicious absence of a wedding band on his finger. Part of Len wanted to drop it and walk away, but another part of him _needed_ to know.

“No ring?” He asked. Barry blinked over at him for a moment and then back down at his left hand.

“Oh… err… no. No ring,” he said, rubbing subconsciously at the bare ring finger.

“I’m sorry,” Len said, surprising himself with his honesty. He had liked Iris well enough. She hadn’t exactly been his favourite person, but she had been strong, and Len respected that. And Barry had clearly loved her. As much as Len disliked how that made him feel, he had secretly wanted Barry to have his happy ending.

“What? Oh, no! She’s alive,” Barry corrected quickly, but that just made Len frown further. He didn’t ask for any elaboration, but Barry gave it to him anyway. “We beat Savitar and then we, err, we got married.” Len _really_ didn’t like how this conversation was making him feel. He didn’t like the twist in his stomach or the pinch in his heart. And he _especially_ didn’t like the reasons behind his sudden discomfort. “We broke up, though. The divorce came through a few months ago.”

"How come?" Len found himself asking. He tried not to care, but it was fruitless.

"I guess... there was just too much pressure. We rushed into things because we thought we knew what we wanted, and it was what everyone expected of us. But in the end, we were just trying to be something we weren't. And that can work for a time… but sooner or later, things come crashing down."

Len winced at Barry's choice of words. Trying to be something you weren't... Len knew that feeling all too well. He was _tired_ of that feeling. He wanted to just be himself for the first time in his life. And looking at Barry... beautiful Barry Allen who had always believed in him even when no one else did, who was kind, and smart, and funny, and fierce, who was newly single, who had the power to leave Len awe-struck, and who had just raced his way back in time to the 1980's just so he could see Len...

Len was silent for far too long, he couldn’t find it in himself to leave anymore, and now Barry was frowning at him.

“L- Leonard,” Barry stumbled over his name, but it made Len feel good that at least he was _trying_. “What’s wrong?” Len didn’t answer. “What? I just spilt all of my troubles. The least you could do is tell me yours. Tit for tat.” Len huffed a laugh at that. Barry was just so… _Barry_. He drove Len crazy, he always had. But not in a bad way. And now he was looking at Len like that, so expectantly, so openly, so… _Barry_. And, _fuck_… Len just wanted to kiss him.

Len blamed these thoughts on Leo Snart. If he'd never heard of his Earth X doppelganger than he wouldn't currently be entertaining the idea of pulling Barry close and licking into his mouth... holding him up against a wall and fucking into him... If it wasn't for Leo Snart, Len might have been able to live the rest of his life blissfully denying his feelings. But now, it was like someone had opened the floodgates and all of this... _this,_ was just pouring out. He had no way of stopping it. And, truthfully, Len didn't know if he wanted to.

“Come on,” Barry teased. “What’s the worst that could happen?” And it was almost like he could read Len’s mind.

Oh_, fuck it_.

He didn't give himself time to think, knowing he would only talk himself out of it as he had done so many times before. Instead, he cupped Barry's face and surged forward. He didn't know what he expected to happen. He didn't know whether he expected Barry to freeze up or pull away, but he was pleasantly surprised when Barry dipped forward to meet him halfway.

And then, that was it: Leonard Snart was kissing a man. And not just _any_ man. He was kissing the Flash. The years of unresolved tension finally built up to an explosion of lips and teeth and tongue.

It wasn't much different than kissing a woman, Len realised idly. The angle was different. Women were usually shorter than him, but Barry was just a hairsbreadth taller. He was a little surprised by that, actually: logically Len knew that he and Barry were essentially the same height, but Barry just gave off so much raw power that he _seemed_ taller.

Despite the similarities, Len still found himself nervous but Barry seemed more than happy to take control, crowding Len up against the console, caging him in. Not that Leonard had any intention of escaping this. Barry's hands were on his body, running down his chest, clamping onto his hips, pulling their bodies flush. Len gasped, his eyes shooting open as he felt Barry's erection connect with his own dick through the layers of clothes that separated them. Barry began trailing his mouth down Len's neck, biting and sucking and making Len come entirely unravelled. Barry's body was pressed against his own. Solid, warm, warmer than it had any right to be. Len wanted to bury himself in that heat.

He lifted his hand to run it through Barry's hair, and it was only then that he realised he was shaking. He tried to hide it. Tried to stop it. But Barry noticed and pulled back just far enough to look Len in the eyes.

"What's wrong?" He asked for the third time tonight… when had Barry become so good at reading him? Or, was it Len who had become so bad at hiding his emotions? Barry was beginning to look unsure of himself now. "I thought... I thought you wanted this."

"I do," Len admitted. His heart was racing, he could feel it in his throat, he was scared. Leonard Snart, Captain Cold, Villain of Central City, feared by thousands... scared because of a kiss. But he _did_ want this. He wanted this more than he'd ever wanted any jewel or painting. He _needed_ this. But Barry didn't look convinced and Len could feel the opportunity slipping through his fingers along with his courage. He didn't want Barry to stop. He had to find a way to keep him here, keep him doing those extraordinary things with his tongue. The only thing Len could think of was the truth. "I've never done this before. Not with another man," he admitted.

"Oh..."

Leonard Snart hadn't felt embarrassed since he was a kid. It was so long ago that he barely even remembered what it felt like. But tonight, looking at Barry's slack-jawed face, Len was embarrassed. He had half a mind to just say '_forget it_' and push Barry away. But Barry was still holding him so tightly, and their bodies were still pressed so close...

"You've never kissed a man?" Barry asked slowly. He didn't sound judgemental, but Len couldn't quite tell what he was thinking. Too late now to deny it, Len only shook his head

"You have?" Len asked though it wasn't really a question. He knew the answer, had tasted it on Barry's tongue only moments ago. 

"A few."

Len thought about that for a second and nearly laughed. Who would have thought that, out of the two of them, dorky Barry Allen would have the most experience?

“Do… do you like it?” Barry asked, and Len smirked.

“Are you asking if you’re a good kisser, Barry?” He drawled. Barry went a bright red at that. It was cute. Len wondered when exactly he had become so attracted to ‘_cute_’.

He didn’t want to talk anymore. Instead, he pulled Barry closer and kissed him again. It was a little slower this time, a little softer. Barry seemed to be letting him set the pace now, and he was thankful for that. Not that he would ever admit it aloud, but he appreciated being able to take his time. And he _did_. He took his time adjusting to the different angle, to the slight scrape of Barry’s barely-there stubble against his chin, to the large, strong hands holding him close.

Eventually, Len began to push back against Barry a little hotter, a little heavier, a little rougher. And Barry was eager for the change in pace. One of Barry’s hands slipped ever so slightly underneath Len’s sweater, and Len shivered happily. Len’s leg found its way in between Barry’s thighs with Barry’s erection pressed up tight against it, and Len felt his own dick jump in response. On a whim, he tightened his thighs around Barry and ground up against him in one slow, powerful thrust which left Barry gasping and pulling against Len’s waist as though it was possible to pull him any closer.

“Leo,” Barry moaned softly against his ear and Len grit his teeth in response.

“_Len_,” he corrected possessively, punctuating his word with another thrust and feeling Barry’s hips jut forward against him in return.

“Len,” Barry nodded, his breath ghosting against Len’s neck. “Not Lenny?” He joked

“Only if you’re good,” Len drawled, and Barry moaned. The sound sent a jolt down Len’s body all the way to his toes. He was achingly hard now.

"I could...” Barry started to say against the skin on Len’s neck. He paused and then pulled back to look Len in the eyes instead as he reworded. “You could have some other firsts... if you wanted that," he offered.

Len did want that. He was nervous again at the thought. But he _wanted_ it so badly. He wanted _Barry_ so badly. He was nervous, but then he thought about Leo again and if Leo Snart could have sex with men, then Len damn well could too. There was only one Leonard Snart on this earth. There was only one Leonard Snart that should matter to his friends… to _Barry_, and that was _him_. And Len wasn't about to get outdone by his goddamn doppelganger.

He must have nodded, though Len didn’t really remember doing it, because soon Barry was dragging Len away from the console and towards the chairs at the centre of the room instead. Len liked his thinking and pulled Barry to the chair that he had claimed as his own. He wasn’t sure who sat there now. But it was _Len’s_ chair.

Barry pushed him down onto the seat, and Len’s dick gave a twitch inside his jeans at the way he was being manhandled. Barry wasn’t _too_ rough with him that it would make Len uncomfortable, but he was rough enough that Len might just walk away from this whole thing with a few light bruises. It was hot. Barry’s power, not only his speed but the general aura of energy that surrounded him, had always been a bit of a turn-on even before Len had really been willing to admit it to himself.

“Are you sure about this?” Barry asked. “We can… take it slower.”

“The Flash wanting to take things _slow_,” Len drawled. “I never thought I’d see the day.” Barry gave a sly smile at that, but he didn’t move to continue until Len added: “I’m sure.”

Barry leant down above him, kissing Len. It was wet and warm and just a little bit messy, but Len didn’t mind that so much.

“I’ll be right back,” Barry said against Len’s lips. Then he pulled back and fucking _winked_ at Len before disappearing in a crackle of lightning. He was gone for barely ten seconds, but Len began to feel a little stupid as he sat alone, his dick hard and waiting on Barry fucking Allen. When Barry came back, he was grinning wide and holding up a pack of condoms, though the bright orange box wasn’t the first thing that Len’s eyes landed on. Sitting slouched in his chair with Barry standing directly in front of him, he was at the perfect height to see the outline of Barry’s hard cock straining against his jeans. Len felt his heart rate pick up at the sight while his own dick throbbed wantonly in his pants.

When Len eventually managed to take his eyes off of Barry’s cock, he saw that Barry had already opened the box of condoms and upended them on the chair beside him.

“My, my, Barry Allen,” Len purred. “Did you _steal_ those?” Barry had the decency to look guilty. “How naughty of you.” Barry was downright blushing again now, and Len was enjoying every second of it. And then Barry was kissing him, and Len had to grip the side of his seat to keep himself grounded. He thought that if he let go right then, he might just fall… into what though, he wasn’t quite sure.

Idly, Len thought about his reasons for agreeing to this. He knew that having sex with another man for the first time as some sort of twisted competition with his Earth X doppelganger was probably not healthy. And for a moment, Len thought that maybe he should stop. But then Barry was pulling his sweater vest off over his head and crawling onto Len’s lap, looking every bit the hot mess that Len had ever dreamt of, and Len knew that Leo Snart was not the reason he was doing this. Leo might have acted as the push that Len needed, but _Barry_ was why Len was doing this. Barry, with his spectacular body, his messy brown hair, his lust-blown green eyes, his soft lips, his rough hands… Len groaned deep at the back of his throat. He wanted this. He _needed_ this.

Barry was straddling his lap, grinding his hips down slowly. Torturously. Their hard dicks connecting through the layers of fabric that separated them. Every nerve in Len's body felt on fire. He was really doing this.

Barry braced one hand on the back of Len’s chair as he continued to rotate his hips against Len’s cock. Len felt breathless as he took in the sight of Barry Allen, shirtless on his lap, his jeans riding low on his waist as he slowly rocked his hips back and forth. Len watched with open fascination at the way that Barry’s abs tightened and relaxed over and over again as he ground down against Len’s dick. He was overcome with the desire to lean down and lick those perfect little abs, and so he did. He licked all the way up Barry’s body and then sucked one of his nipples into his mouth, scratching it lightly with his teeth in a way that made Barry _howl_ with pleasure. The sound sent a jolt of electricity down to Len’s dick.

Len sat back to better admire his lover as Barry continued to rock against him. Barry brushed his fingers down Len's torso then, coming to a stop just above the zipper on Len's jeans with the tips of his fingers just barely ghosting over Len's erection.

"Are you sure?" He asked one last time, and Len nodded. His heart was pounding too fast and too hard against his chest, his hands were still visibly shaking, and Len didn't think he could speak if he wanted to, but _God yes_ was he sure. He'd been holding this side of himself, these particular desires, back for far too long. And now, Barry… beautiful Barry Allen was sitting on his lap, shirtless, his hard cock straining for attention, looking like a wet dream and offering himself up for the taking. And Len wanted to _take_.

Placated, Barry lowered his fingers to Len's crotch. He momentarily cupped the outline of Len’s cock and gave it a good squeeze. His cock twitched madly at the touch, yearning for more. Barry dipped down to capture Len’s lips again as he reached for his zipper. His fingers made quick work of it, and then before Len even knew it, Barry's hand was slipping inside his jeans and grasping Len’s erection.

He had another man’s hand directly on his dick. He had _Barry’s_ hand on him. Skin to skin contact. Barry began stroking him, thumbing his slit and smearing his precum up and down Len’s aching cock. Len grabbed Barry’s hips so tight it must have been at least a little painful and he groaned a deep guttural moan.

Barry’s tongue was in his mouth again. Claiming him. And Len’s heart raced ever faster. He thrust his hips upwards and gasped against Barry’s lips. Barry was going too slow, and Len needed _more_.

And as though answering his prayers, Barry slipped off of Len’s lap and down onto his knees instead, his hands leaving Len's cock only long enough to tug his jeans down past his thighs and put a condom on him. He looked up and into Len’s eyes as he reached out for Len’s weeping cock and leaned forward, guiding it into his waiting mouth. Len’s lips parted in a silent groan as he watched, gripping tightly at his own thighs as he did his very best not to fuck up into Barry’s hot, wet, mouth. But that heat, that tongue, that beautifully slick and eager mouth of Barry’s was driving him _insane_.

Barry took Len’s hand and moved it to his hair, encouragingly. Len didn’t need to be told twice as he happily buried his fingers into Barry’s brown locks, pulling on him as he tried his very best not to thrust his hips up to chase that tantalising wet heat.

This whole time, Barry maintained his eye contact, his big Bambi staring up at Len as he lowered his head further and further down Len cock. Len watched as more and more of his throbbing dick disappeared between Barry’s slick reddened lips. He felt his cock hit the back of Barry’s throat, but Barry only paused for a moment as he readjusted the angle and then kept going, taking every inch that Len could offer without once taking those big beautiful green eyes off of Len’s face.

Len was shaking now, his hand clenched so tightly in Barry’s hair that he was starting to worry it was hurting him. But Barry didn’t complain or pull away. And his eyes only fluttered closed once his lips finally reached the base of Len’s cock.

Len was completely unravelled by this point, panting and sweating with Barry’s head buried deep between his legs. He wasn’t used to letting someone else take control, allowing them to set the pace as he just went along for the ride. But, with Barry, it felt _right_. He didn’t know if he would have managed this if it had been with anyone else.

When Barry eventually began to move, Len let out a staggered breathy moan. He felt the cool air momentarily hit his spit-slickened cock and shivered from the loss of Barry’s heat. And then, as Barry bobbed his head from base to tip and back again, he began _vibrating_. And it took all of Len’s willpower not to come right then and there. He felt the hum of it against his aching dick, setting every nerve afire. Len dropped his head back against his chair and let out the lewdest moan, his toes curling up inside his boots from the effort it took not to come on the spot.

“Fuck, Barry,” he panted. Barry had picked up the pace now, fucking his mouth up and down Len’s over-sensitive dick. Len blinked his eyes open again and looked down and watched as his cock disappeared and reappeared from between Barry’s impatient lips. “You’re going to be the death of me… again,” he added on as an afterthought. Barry stared back up at him again, and Len could see the snarky comeback he was desperate to make in his eyes. Too bad his mouth was otherwise occupied right at that moment.

But Barry had other ways to get his point across. He reached his hand down to fondle Len as he continued to blow him. Len gasped at the teasing touch and had absolutely no way to prepare himself for what came next as Barry decided to vibrate both his tongue _and_ his hand at the same time. Len exploded with pleasure and came so hard he saw stars, spilling his load into the condom as Barry sucked him through his orgasm.

He hadn’t lasted very long, Len realised. Not long at all. But he supposed he could forgive himself this once considering his bed partner had turned out to be a literal human vibrator…

Barry pulled off of his softening cock with a wet ‘pop’ and Len somehow found the strength to loosen his grip in Barry’s hair. There was a bit of spit running down Barry’s chin, and Len wanted to lean forward and wipe it away… but he found himself physically incapable of moving for the time being.

Barry rolled the condom off of Len’s dick, tying a knot in it and moving to stand. He was beginning to look a little awkward, a striking contrast to the confident man who’d just been blowing Len to within an inch of his life.

Len darted his tongue out to wet his lips as he looked his lover up and down. Making a decision, Len lent forward in his seat to grab Barry’s hand and pull him closer. Barry stumbled to a stop inches from Len, who’s free hand had now wandered down to Barry’s zipper in an attempt to release his still-untouched cock. His fingers fumbled a little and Barry shot a hand out to stop him.

“You don’t have to if you don’t want. If you’re not yet ready,” Barry reassured, always with the bleeding heart. “I can just…” he trailed off and waved his hand in some vague gesture which Len assumed meant he would take care of it himself. But as much as Len would enjoy having a front-row seat to _that_ show, there was something else he would much rather be doing. Because Len _did_ want this. That was the point. That was why he was so scared.

He didn’t think he had the words to describe what he felt though, and so he just continued on with undoing the button and zipper on Barry’s jeans. He wanted to get on his knees for Barry, but his legs were so weak, whether that was from his nerves or the life-altering orgasm though Len wasn’t too sure. Probably a bit of both. But, either way, he honestly doubted his ability to move from this chair so he hoped that the angle would be good enough.

“I won’t last long,” Barry warned him, and Len laughed.

“Neither did I,” he managed to say. It took more than a little effort to keep his voice even.

“No,” Barry was shaking his head and blushing a deep crimson red. “Seriously, I won’t last. It’s… it’s a speedster thing.” Huh. Len had never considered how Barry’s powers could affect his sex life before. But it seemed there was a lot about Barry’s speed that Len had never considered, like the fact he could _vibrate his tongue_! Len was still not over that. He didn’t think he would _ever_ be over that. Barry fell quiet as Len finished undoing his zipper and Barry kicked his jeans off along with his shoes to stand gloriously naked in front of Len.

This was it. After another few seconds, Len would never again be able to honestly say he’d never touched another man’s cock, that he’d never _tasted_ another man’s cock. He felt his nerves bubbling in his stomach… he felt his excitement bubbling _lower_.

Barry’s dick was pleasant enough to look at. It wasn’t quite as long as his own was, but it was perhaps a little thicker. Absently, Len wondered if Barry could vibrate his cock too. The thought of it gave him a little thrill as he imagined what that would feel like buried deep inside of him, though Len knew that he was not ready for… _that_.

As Len looked his lover over, Barry’s cock gave a twitch of interest and Len realised that Barry’s hand had been clenching and unclenching impatiently at his side.

“Honestly, I might just come untouched if you keep looking at me like that,” Barry laughed. He sounded entirely sincere. Len couldn’t let that happen, though it might have been fun to watch… to tie Barry up a little and tease him in _other_ ways… he wondered how long it would take Barry to come untouched in that scenario. He wondered what kind of things he would need to do to Barry’s body until he could sit back and watch Barry’s dick jump and spill his white seed against his own stomach…

But that wasn’t what Len was here for. He was here to suck Barry’s cock, and Goddammit he was _going_ to suck Barry’s cock.

He just… wasn’t quite sure _how_ yet…

Sure, he’d been on the receiving end of a fair few blow jobs in his life, but he had never allowed himself to so much as consciously _think_ about giving one before. Not outside of his dreams, but memories of those were fleeting at best.

Slowly, Len lifted his hand up to grasp the pink weeping cock in front of his face. Barry immediately let out a low rumbled moan and a raspy “_oh God_” at the first brush of calloused hands against tender skin. He even let out a small whimper. So, Barry wasn’t lying… he really _was_ that close to coming.

Len looked over to the seat beside him and grabbed another condom with his free hand. He tore the packet open and slipped it over Barry’s waiting dick. That part was easy and familiar, even if it was someone else’s dick and not his own. The next part, however…

“How do you like it?” Len eventually gave in and asked, looking up to see Barry staring down at him with those big green eyes.

“Here,” Barry said, his voice barely any louder than a breathy whisper, reaching down to manoeuvre Len’s hand slightly and showing him exactly where to hold him and how tight he liked it. Len instantly began to relax a little. It was kind of pathetic, having a man so much younger than Len teaching him something new about sex. But it was _Barry_, and somehow that took the sting out of it. “I’m particularly sensitive here,” Barry told him as he led Len’s thumb to the underside of his dick.

Len pressed against the spot and Barry let out a gasp, nodding. Len felt a vein in Barry’s cock throbbing heavily against his thumb and played with rubbing small circles along the area, pressing just a little and releasing again. Barry’s hips gave a shuddering thrust forward. It was just a small involuntary movement, but it made Len a little tense.

“Sorry,” Barry whispered, but Len waved him off, mentally anyway. Physically his hands were a little too busy with one rubbing gently at Barry’s cock and the other holding onto Barry’s hip so tightly you’d think he was holding on for dear life. Barry didn’t seem to mind that either though and Len was beginning to believe that the kid might have just a little bit of a pain kink. Len didn’t want to push it too far, but that was probably something they would be exploring at a later date.

Len let his tongue dart out to wet his lips once more, his mouth going a little dry from all of his heavy breathing.

Eventually, he built up enough courage to move his head closer. Barry became extremely still, so much so that Len was convinced he was holding his breath. Slowly, purposefully, he closed his eyes and pressed his tongue flat against the sensitive underside of Barry’s cock. It felt strange, heavy and warm.

He felt Barry shaking against him and heard his gasping breaths as Len closed his lips around the spot and gave it a sucking kiss. Barry seemed to like that. _A lot_. Feeling a little more confident, Len pulled back only to return a second later to lick his way up Barry’s dick from base to tip.

He played with the head of Barry’s cock for a little while: sucking, kissing, sealing his lips around it, pressing his tongue against Barry’s slit… all the while listening out for Barry’s gasps, moans, and curses. He wanted to take his time learning what Barry liked, but the twitching cock in front of his face reminded him that Barry was on the very edge and only moments away from tumbling over.

Without really pausing to think it through, Len slipped his lips down and over the tip of Barry’s cock, down past his head, as far down as he could comfortably go without pushing himself too far too soon. His tongue didn’t quite reach that sweet spot that Barry liked so much, so he used his thumb to rub at it again, a little rougher this time than before, as he began to lift his mouth up and down Barry’s pulsing cock.

Len managed to open his eyes, looking up at his lover as Barry’s cock filled his mouth over and over again. Barry's head was thrown back, his mouth parted in a silent moan, a shine of sweat clinging to his exposed neck and glistening across his chest and abs. Len watched him coming undone and grew ever more confident.

His eyes flickered closed as Barry's cock fucked in and out of his eager mouth a few more times. It felt heavy and strange against Len’s tongue, but it was _good_ too. Len liked the feeling of Barry’s dick in his mouth, he realised. He pictured what Barry was feeling, the wet heat of Len’s mouth surrounding his cock, and it made Len feel a little hotter… the heat pooling in his groin. It had only been a few minutes ago that Barry had been doing this to him and Len liked the idea of reciprocating that same kind of pleasure.

He took a little bit more of Barry’s cock in his mouth the next time he went down, and it twitched against his tongue. Fuck, he _really _liked that feeling.

Len closed his eyes a little tighter and tried to pick up his pace, pushing himself just a little bit faster as Barry’s cock slid out and thrust back into his mouth. The room was silent all except for the sounds of Barry’s heavy breaths combined with the wet noises escaping Len’s lips. He’d never realised how loud a blow job could be before, how messy.

He felt Barry shaking against him and opened his eyes, looking up again in time watch Barry's face as he came with a cry of Len’s name on his lips, shooting his load into Len's mouth. He looked so beautiful, so hot, so thoroughly fucked, that if Len hadn't come already, he would be coming now at the sight of Barry alone.

Slowly, Len eased himself off, wiping his mouth dry as he felt his spit running down his chin. His legs felt stronger again, _he_ felt stronger, he felt _amazing_. So, he stood up, cupped Barry’s face and kissed him. It was sloppy and heated and absolutely perfect. Barry melted into him, and it was like the rest of the world no longer mattered.

Eventually, they found themselves sitting on the floor together. Len had pulled his jeans back up and tucked himself back in, but Barry had decided to put only his briefs back on and was lying there otherwise naked. Len didn’t mind the sight one bit though so he was not going to complain.

Instead, he threaded his fingers back through Barry’s messy hair and leant back against the seat behind him as they spoke.

“So, what else did I miss out on?” He asked, and Barry laughed. It wasn’t necessarily a happy laugh, though.

“Honestly, it’s been a rough couple of years,” he admitted. “I even got sent to Iron Heights at one point.” Len bolted upright and stared Barry down. He had to be joking, right?

"_You_ got locked up?” He asked, astonished when Barry only nodded. No hint of a joke on his face. “Wish I'd been there to see that," he muttered

"Why? So, you could gloat."

"Maybe,” Len shrugged. Then he lay back down with Barry, lounging on his side and propping his head on his elbow in a mirror image of how Barry was lying. “Maybe I would have just broken you out."

"I'm the Flash. I don't need anyone to break me out of prison," Barry reminded him, and Len just shrugged.

"Would have done it anyway,” he drawled, and Barry rolled his eyes, leaning in for another kiss. It was soft and warm and slow. And Len liked it, he _really_ liked it. He liked _Barry_. He hadn’t even realised just how much until today. How had he ever been able to deny his feelings for Barry Allen for so long? Len scooted a little closer and felt the press of Barry’s erect dick against his leg. He broke the kiss, frowning, and looked down and yep… there it was. The outline of his hard cock straining against his briefs, making them damp already as it wept with pre-come, even though Len had only finished blowing him a few minutes ago.

“It’s a…” Barry started, waving his hand vaguely, and sounding just a little embarrassed.

“A Flash thing?” Len finished for him, and Barry nodded, blushing. Len kissed him again, pushing at his shoulders until he got Barry to lie down on his back. Len crawled on top of him, straddling his thighs and running his hand down Barry’s naked body. Barry grabbed at Len’s hips, holding him tightly as he shivered and quaked underneath Len’s touch. Len’s hand slowly dipped low, scratching him lightly with his fingernails, and then going back up Barry’s body again in a long and drawn-out circle. But every time he went a little lower, a little further down Barry’s torso, closer and closer and…

There was the soft sound of footsteps on the floor ahead of them.

Len sat up in time to see Sara enter the room, barefoot and wearing grey pyjamas which read ‘_world’s best Captain_’ in big block letters on the front. Idly, Len thought that he might just have to fight her for that shirt…

She did a double-take as she saw Len atop a seemingly naked Barry, lying on the floor and in such a very precarious position. Then she gave a little shout of surprise and lifted her hand to cover her eyes.

“Jeez, Leonard! You _do_ have a bunk, you know?” She all but shouted. Barry froze up underneath him, wrapping his arms around his chest as though he could cover himself up.

“Guess I forgot,” Len shrugged, feeling calmer than he would have expected. Sure, his heart was in his throat, and every muscle in his legs felt like they’d turned to jelly at being caught with another man naked and erect between his thighs. But… Len was surprisingly okay with people knowing. _Some_ people, anyway. He figured it would take him a while to become as open about this as Sara was but… Len thought that maybe he might just get there one day. Looking down at Barry, bare and beautiful underneath him, Len thought that perhaps that day might come sooner than he thought. “A little privacy would be nice,” Len called, but he didn’t look up to see how Sara reacted to that because he was too busy kissing Barry again. He _thought_ he heard her grumbling something about how this was her damn ship as she walked away, but Len wasn’t sure.

Len didn’t get much sleep that night.

At first, it had been because he couldn’t get his mind off of Leo Snart. But then afterwards, it was because he couldn’t get his _hands_ off of Barry Allen.

But a little sleep deprivation was a price he was more than happy to pay. Because by the time the sun came up the next morning, and the Legends began to stir and rise for the day ahead, Len had completed a few more _firsts_. Including, maybe, falling just a little bit in love with his _first_ boyfriend.

**Author's Note:**

> I got some serious feels when thinking this one up though I think it ended up a lot less emotional than my original draft did. And it was so weird writing a fic that didn’t really have any fluff in it… so different than my usual writing tbh. I hope you all liked it anyway.
> 
> Leave me a comment and let me know your thoughts!  
Honestly, I want to hear what you have to say. Obviously, I’d love to know what you liked about the fic. But any constructive criticism would also be much appreciated. I’m trying my best to improve my writing and expand my portfolio, so to speak, and your help would make that a lot easier. Even if it’s something that I might not necessarily be able to edit about this specific fic (like an issue with the plot, for example), I’d like to hear your thoughts so I can watch out for it and not make the same mistake again in the future :D
> 
> PS. I’m still giggling about the accidental blow job pun which I wrote into the summary of this fic.


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